Journey of my fall - A letter.

    I remember that starry night, you sitting beside me on the sledge of our balcony. Sipping down beer and smoking alternatively. Choked with emotions and eyes filled with pain. You took me to revisit the dreadful memories of your past. A relationship, that you valued the most.

    I remember how awful you felt, while refreshing those moments, but still you gathered all the courage to tell me everything about it.

    I remember and I felt the pain when you explained me, how you were mentally exhausted and abused, while trying to keep your relationship alive.

    I remember our struggle to carry yourself out of that relationship.

    I remember every message and call from that person, lying in your phone’s blocked list, which were made to harass you and continued to abuse you.

    I remember, I used to read all those messages and calls from the blocked list. My intentions were not to spy on you but to understand the pain and trauma, you were going through. I am very proud, the way you held yourself through all of it.

    I remember, then looking myself all over your call lists, messages and social media accounts. My name in bright and bold at the top of your contact list. I felt lucky, to be the only person, you wanted to talk to, your home, your everything.

    I agree, it wasn’t easy, but definitely not impossible to get you out of your past and take you to the brighter side of life, where the sun could shine on my sunshine. I strived hard to not let you visit those past memories and you stay happy with all the love that I could shower upon you.

    Filling the dark void of your past with all the happiness, I never realized the sand slipping off  my feet. Today I can’t breathe among these people in your blocked list.